Pomegranate Martinis

Did you know that in some cultures pomegranates are a symbol representing fertility, abundance and marriage . . I found that out the other day and have decided that I better have a little pomegranate in my life on a regular basis - so tonight is the night for pomegranate martinis . . which makes DH cringe - since his idea of a cocktail is Newman's Own Lemonade or a Virgin Pina Colada. I think he should be estatic that I have found another way to enhance the famiIy fertility - and since I promised that if and when we get preggers - I will give up the alcohol - he should indulge me. Doncha Think?

Where there is a will . . there is a way

As long as I can remember I have hated needles. Mommy Dearest tells all sorts of stories about how I would "try and faint" whenever I had to have a shot or give blood . . well I've Come A Long Way Baby!

A few years ago, my good friend "O" turned me on to acupuncture - better than antidepressants or wine she said. I however, like a combination of all 3 - but I digress.

So I have been experiencing acupunture treatments for almost 4 years - and have felt better once I could get past the initial panic of the needles staying in my limbs for 30 minutes.

Fast forward to January 2007 and the conversation with the now "fired" RE ( I like to think of his practice as the Hyundai Dealership of Reproductive Medicine ). I broke down in tears in his office as he told me about all the shots I would have the pleasure of receiving during the IVF process - but for "the team" I signed up. Then for the hell of it - I decided to start allergy shots - every other week - one shot in each arm . . for the next 2-3 years. Sometimes you just gotta go for broke . .

So close your eyes and imagine my February 2007 - I get up at 6:45 am - DH administers shot in the stomach - I go to work - during lunch I go get a shot in each arm - then come home and I get another shot or 2 in the stomach before bed.

Fast forward to March 2007 - first IVF cycle "cancelled" - lots of finger pointing - RE is fired. I let DH do that - I am non-confrontational on certain things and I really think that I was so disappointed in the RE - that I didn't want to deal. Brief respite from the IVF needles but ladies and gentleman - THEY'RE BACK!

But now - with the new RE -(the Mercedes- Benz Dealership of Reproductive Medicine) - DH is now giving me shots in "the upper quadrant of my buttocks" instead of those wimpy needles in my stomach. Boy do I miss those "wimpy" needles . . but luckily - since I have gained 50 pounds post wedding with all these fun infertility treatment - there is a big ole target for him.

So here I sit - a woman who used to "try and faint" when I saw a needle - getting shots in my a-- on the regular, having allergy shots and spending an hour with 12-15 acupuncture needles all over my body once a week - all in pursuit of peace, happiness and "baby d".

As my BFF told me some years back when I was lamenting the state of my life "just remember in this moment - that this is as good as is gets . . ". So if I can withstand all these needles and we can get a baby or two out of it - then this is just the tip of as good as it gets.

And of course DH will owe me forever . . .

Doing The Ian

In an attempt to be more productive on the J-O-B - I have committed myself to drive my neighbor to work each morning that I am in town - and he has as many rules as I do - if not more - so we leave each morning at 7:05 a.m. The upside is that we get to use the HOV lane - so I am at work by 7:30 a.m.

We all agree that he is single handly improving my company's bottom line and my productivity because he is the only reason that I leave the house at this insane hour.

It is not that I want to be sleeping - it is that I want to "piddle and diddle" around my house in the morning. I want to watch TV, read the paper, contemplate my navel and just generally drag my feet.

Secretly, I think that I preparing myself for the day when we have kids and I lose the opportunity to lay in bed until the last possible moment. That must be it - otherwise why would I torture myself with a 5:25 a.m. alarm . .

Off to get ready to meet Ian!

Infertility

This is what has driven me to blogging and putting my life on blast. I never thought I would be one of those women who counted the number of failed IUI's or blamed her "incompetent" RE for failure to use the proper protocol. But here I am . . DH thinks that God will take care of us - and all I can think is that God gives us tools and we better use them. I got married at 39 - so did I assume the risk? Am I that cartoon character who forgot to get married and forgot to have kids! Sometimes I think yes. But here I am at age 41 - spending in excess of $25,000 to have a baby and I keep wondering - if God doesn't give you more than you can handle - I must have a SPECIAL place in heaven.

Why Am I Putting My Life on Blast?

If you know me at all, you know I always have a story to tell. And let me tell you that the past couple of years of my life have been one big drama - just waiting to get told to an audience. The difficulty here is that I am no longer just me with my story - I have a husband - who is uber private and is cringing to think that you dear reader are in his business. Well, his business is my business and I am putting my business on blast. Yes Mother - all that money on a fancy education and I am using slang . . oh and by the way Santa Claus is a black man